Base on good intention, I packed 12 golf balls into beautiful gift box and give away during the "Hook a kid on golf" program. There were 6 dozens of them I believe, all recycled golf ball from my garage, which I picked up throughout the years while playing golf. I told my friend I have a junk ball collection, whenever I picked up balls on the golf course, if they are not my brand or model, I just threw into this box, it became a big pale of golf balls through the years.
I was giving this beautiful one dozen of golf ball in a box to a kid who perform the best in the group, I gave him / her the whole box. There was a kid named Jeremiah and he was under my coaching in full swing section, he did not win this box of ball because other kids hit the ball straighter or higher. He ran to me and asked me: "Coach Joey, why didn't you pick me for the prizes?"
I said, "Jeremiah, you did not win, Kyle did so he got the box."
He continued, "But you are the one coaching me, you should choose me over others."
I replied. "That is not so, it is a fair competition, everyone have the same chance, I am coaching you does not mean you have a higher chance than others, you would have to perform in order to get the prizes."
He walked away with disappointment in his eyes, my heart sunken a bit but still firm.
In my firm belief, always an over-achiever, I have to perform and excel in order to get the prizes or good grades in school. I thought giving prizes would motivate them to excel and ignite their fire of winning inside of them. And I also intend to give the best and give it all to the best performance candidate.
While Victor was coaching the full swing section, I gave him a box of ball to distribute to the winner of the group, he made everyone of them swing and try their best, then he voted with other coaches who swing the best got the maximum amount of ball, but the one who did not hit the ball too good still get 2 ball for encouragement. He told me the kids are all happy, some get more balls some get less. But they all get something and no one walk away empty handed with disappointment in they eyes.
We had this discussion over dinner at a restaurant, he told me all these kids receive are rejection in society, why are they here for?! more rejection from you? That you gave all the ball to ONE good candidate, the rest have to feel lousy because they did not do as good?! They all tried very hard and some are more athletic some just aren't. I should give something to everyone, just give the good performer a little more than others, so the kids won't feel being rejected, they need encouragement at this age, they need someone to tell them yes you can do it, someone to build them up not to take them down to tell them you are not good enough.
Even I am a capitalist, have to agree Victor is a better coach than I am.
Later at the putting section, Jeremiah won in making the longest putt, I gave him the ball and he did not want to put into his golf bag. I asked him why, he said he wants to bring it home to mom and tell her he won these balls today!
Victor is obviously a better coach, he sees the deepest needs of the kids; I looked at the instant performance. Which I have to say, he is a better coach than me!
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