what have I learnt?

I have learnt to be patience, it may not be my turn to get the goodies today, my chance may come tomorrow;

I have learnt to respect, if I don't want to be yelled at then I should not yell at others;

I have learnt to service, when I service others, my own problems seems so little;

I have learnt not to tell God how to play his dice, perhaps his dice rolls in miraculous way and everything would work out when the time comes;

I have learnt to look into my box and be happy with what I've got, not to look at others and think something is always missing in my box.

I have learnt...... a lot!

everybody got something

It was the end of the 'hook a kid on golf' program yesterday, we made a little graduation day for them. In order to execute Victor's communism, every kid got a little box of gift with an award title on it.

I know many of them needed gloves because blisters have developed on their little palm after beating balls 4 days in a roll. Silly me, did not think of calling my pro at Eastpointe Country Club, on friday morning I gave him a call, told him about the program and the kids need gloves. He is very kind, he said there are a few pair junior gloves left and new stock hasn't arrive for the next season, I am very welcomed to take those and he honestly said he could not cover all 17 kids. But there are some topflite gloves on sale for $5 a piece, I could get some men's cadet small size for them. So he donated 5 pcs and I purchased 5 pcs together we have 10, it covered more than half of the kids, I originally thought.

Sometime things have its way to work out, if I stop because I could not cover all 17 kids, it would be none for everybody. But I let God decide what is the right thing to do, I felt gloves are big items for them and I should get some. Turns out 3 kids couldn't come, one kid already got an old glove, two girls got used gloves from me and another coach, at the end, only one boy does not have a glove and he traded his glove with another girl who really wants a glove in order to get iron head covers.

No matter how well you think you do something, you can not please the whole world and it is ok. I have this kid named Kyle, he is pretty athletic and think he is the best and deserves the best. When he saw the other kid named Tre got a box of gift with 5 smaller items in it, he said to me with an annoying face:

"Look, how come Tre has so many things in his box and I only got 2?"

I replied, "You should be happy with what you got, not to look at other people's box and think you have less. You actually have much more than Tre. You got a brand new glove Tre does not."

Kyle doesn't stop, "but my title is the best putter, I deserve more in my gift."

I replied with a smile, "You already got more, you just do not see it. You got a whole box of new-looking ball from me on tuesday, there are 12 in a box, not many people have that. The next day you got another 6 balls from me, Tre did not have those balls at all, he had 0, so his gift box deserve a few more items in it."

Tre immediately packed his stuffs back in the box in lightening speed and walk away. I am sure he was afraid I was going to take something away from him, I wasn't going to. The one who deserves more get more, the one who never gets enough would never have enough no matters how much you give them, so it doesn't matter. The universe has its adjustment, I just feel I did the best I can and that is the end of it.

Capitalism or Communism

Base on good intention, I packed 12 golf balls into beautiful gift box and give away during the "Hook a kid on golf" program. There were 6 dozens of them I believe, all recycled golf ball from my garage, which I picked up throughout the years while playing golf. I told my friend I have a junk ball collection, whenever I picked up balls on the golf course, if they are not my brand or model, I just threw into this box, it became a big pale of golf balls through the years.

I was giving this beautiful one dozen of golf ball in a box to a kid who perform the best in the group, I gave him / her the whole box. There was a kid named Jeremiah and he was under my coaching in full swing section, he did not win this box of ball because other kids hit the ball straighter or higher. He ran to me and asked me: "Coach Joey, why didn't you pick me for the prizes?"

I said, "Jeremiah, you did not win, Kyle did so he got the box."

He continued, "But you are the one coaching me, you should choose me over others."

I replied. "That is not so, it is a fair competition, everyone have the same chance, I am coaching you does not mean you have a higher chance than others, you would have to perform in order to get the prizes."

He walked away with disappointment in his eyes, my heart sunken a bit but still firm.

In my firm belief, always an over-achiever, I have to perform and excel in order to get the prizes or good grades in school. I thought giving prizes would motivate them to excel and ignite their fire of winning inside of them. And I also intend to give the best and give it all to the best performance candidate.

While Victor was coaching the full swing section, I gave him a box of ball to distribute to the winner of the group, he made everyone of them swing and try their best, then he voted with other coaches who swing the best got the maximum amount of ball, but the one who did not hit the ball too good still get 2 ball for encouragement. He told me the kids are all happy, some get more balls some get less. But they all get something and no one walk away empty handed with disappointment in they eyes.

We had this discussion over dinner at a restaurant, he told me all these kids receive are rejection in society, why are they here for?! more rejection from you? That you gave all the ball to ONE good candidate, the rest have to feel lousy because they did not do as good?! They all tried very hard and some are more athletic some just aren't. I should give something to everyone, just give the good performer a little more than others, so the kids won't feel being rejected, they need encouragement at this age, they need someone to tell them yes you can do it, someone to build them up not to take them down to tell them you are not good enough.

Even I am a capitalist, have to agree Victor is a better coach than I am.

Later at the putting section, Jeremiah won in making the longest putt, I gave him the ball and he did not want to put into his golf bag. I asked him why, he said he wants to bring it home to mom and tell her he won these balls today!

Victor is obviously a better coach, he sees the deepest needs of the kids; I looked at the instant performance. Which I have to say, he is a better coach than me!

Hook a kid on golf

This is a program sponsored by Palm Beach County, endorsed by Raymond Floyd, a retired professional golfer. The concept behind the program is to supply underprivileged children with knowledge and equipment about golf, also provide a venue for them to play free of charge. There are 15 to 20 children from the boys and girls club of Riviera Beach are attending from Monday to Friday, 3 hours each day and I am volunteering as one of the coach. There would be speakers to teach the kids about rules of golf, drug awareness and positive living...etc.

Most of the children are African American, a few of them are Hispanic, hey I am not racial profiling, I myself is an alien to this country. But once the kids arrive to the Par 3 golf course on Ocean Blvd at Lake Worth, they noticed I am the only *not* American coach. So they asked:

"Are you Korean?" "Are you Chinese?"

I replied, "Yes I am Chinese, you are very smart."

"Do you cook Chinese food?" they asked with their eyes wide open.

"Yes, I cook Chinese food, also Italian food too." I answered with a smile.

"Do you do Kungfu too?" They jumped on me like I am someone very special coming out from ShaoLin Temple.

"No, I am sorry I don't do Kungfu. But I do golf very well." I replied.

We separate the kids in 3 groups and rotate them in 3 section of teaching - putting, chipping and full swing sections. They collect their junior golf clubs sponsored by a local golf store, could not believe the whole set of brand new clubs would be theirs if they attend everyday for 5 days in a row. One girl asked me, which one of the golf clubs is she taking home, I told her all of them, her eyes sparkled and asked me again: "All of these?!" "Yes, this new set of club with the bag is yours, see? your name is on the bag, this is your bag now and you have to take care of it and use it well." I told her. I could sense she has this feeling that she is not worthy for the brand new set of golf clubs, I replied emotionally yes you are worthy of everything.

The goal of this program is to introduce them to this sport - Golf at no costs, through the program we would also teach them sportsmanship, integrity, honesty, respect, etiquette, focus, courage and determination along with technical knowledge; the idea behind is to hope that one day they would choose a sport to focus on rather than drugs or gangs.

Angkor Wat

Recently I am addicted to a program called "Ancient Alien", it is a documentary program collects information from all around the world about earth being visited by Alien during ancient time. It took a closer look at Mayan's, Chinese's, Indian's, an African tribe in Mali central Africa, Polynesian and South American's record. However, the program did not cover Cambodia.

Attached photos of Angkor Wat, Wat means temple in Khmer (Cambodian Language, Wat means temple in Thai Language too). This Kingdom was built around 800AD, the temple area scattered in the middle of the city and also remote area in the jungle. I was so amazed at the workmanship of the stone, and wondered how could those people move and carve these stones without advance technology? If you take a close look at the photo, each Buddha's face was carved to perfection with different facial expression on granite or limestone, I mean these are not sandstone which could be polished easily. Each block could weight a ton and mean while you have each stack on top of each other so seamlessly.

The funny thing about them all described a war between the Gods and Evils at the end, on the other side of the globe, I saw this detail relief on a stone carving wall at Angkor Wat, there are Gods on Chariots and Evils on monster-looking flying animal fighting against each other. This wall was carved 1200 years ago, I just could not believe the way they could build this temple or palace at that level of technology.

Regarding to the program, it stated that there are shafts inside the Pyramids and this tiny little window used to point to the sky, a location where a planet used to be, its name is "Sirius". This particular planet wasn't found until 1940's and it could not be seen with naked eyes, also found there are Sirius B and Sirius C orbit Sirius A (the main planet)

The crazy thing about it all, a tribe located at Mali central Africa celebrates a festival each year to remember their sky-keeper, which taught the tribe to pinpoint the location of Sirius A, B & C !!! They have a tool which made from iron, it actually shows the exact orbit from Sirius B and C toward A, isn't it amazing? And they said these sky-keeper from "Sirius" visited them 1200 years ago meanwhile we just found these planets in the 40's !!!

Immigration interview

yesterday was the interview with U.S.C.I.S., I was given a book to study about United States history and civil knowledge a few months ago after they took my finger prints and photos. There were a writing test, reading test, oral test and civic test all in one - interview, I thought there would be a whole brunch of people in the classroom and take these tests together, end up I was assigned an examiner and everything was done in his office one on one.

At the beginning of introduction, he asked me a lot of questions such as my name change after marriage, did I commit a crime before, was I convicted in any where in the world, was I deported from any countries before...... everything was a "no" answer. Suddenly he asked me if our country is under another terrorist attack, am I willing to defend the nation and work in the military, of course I answered "yes if necessary". It was going on like that for about 5 minutes, he mixed the "yes" answer into all the "no" all together to make sure I am listening to him carefully and answer him with total understanding.

The funny thing was he is an art collector, he then showed me his chinese porcelain collection and antique wood carving pieces, he wanted to know my opinion on each item. I told him which one is obviously "not real" and where to look for details, which one is about 150 years old and why....etc. this went on for about 15 minutes.

Out from the blue he asked me my first civic tests question:
1. which group of people were brought to United States as slaves?

I paused for about 3 seconds because my mind was in those antique pieces, then I answered him "The African", starting to switch my mind back to the test.

2. Why did they fight the British to start this nation?

"Because of high taxes and the British army stayed at people's house and land."

3. What is the highest judicial institution in United States?

"The Supreme Court"

4. Who is our Vice President?

"Joe Biden"

5. Who makes the federal laws?

"The senates and the house of representatives"

6. How many amendments are there in the constitution?

"27"

I was told they will ask 10 questions out from the 100 and I have to answer 6 correctly to pass the civic test, well this gentleman asked me 6 and I hit them all so he stopped right there.

He then said to me, quoted:
"You are a very intelligent chinese lady, welcome to United States"

"Thank you, I appreciate it."

Viola! That's the end of my interview, passing with flying color!

Home sweet home

After the tiring 40+ hours flight with layover at London + New Jersey, we eventually arrive home safely.

Let me tell you, we seriously doubted why we had to go somewhere when we stepped into the house, it looked so gorgeous compared to what we saw in Thailand, the house itself is the best vacation home ever. Anyway we have accomplished a lot as far as the research trip is concerned, victor has come to the fact that he was in shocked for the first 4 days, when we had to leave the town he said he is going to miss Hua Hin, what a big difference!

A few hours before our departure, we had to return the rental car. Thank God we did not have any serious accident, the new york taxi driver style of Victor has put some scratches on the front left bumper and the rubber piece below the bumper was missing. We put down some cash for deposit when we rented the car 22 days ago, Victor strategically parked the car very close to the next car on the left side so the guy couldn't see those scratches...... of course we got 100% of our deposit back. I wanted to get a bottle water next door at a 7-11 afterward, Vic just pulled my elbow and said: Let's get out of here ASAP!

safely arrived wednesday night after 1am, the 40+hour flight & wait time was killing both of us, I was in better shape than Victor.

Now I have a lot to catch up and take time to recharge my battery, at least 4 days just to relax. I say relax but I know I can't relax. Ends up one fuse jumped in the garage when we were not home and my giant chest freezer lost power for a long time, all the food inside were spoiled and that smell is really bad. It took me 2 hours to clean up and I have to get rid of that rotten smell in the garage, lots of work!